Gamifying yesterday's problem

I wrote yesterday about how I have a massive problem with handling money.  And I've written before about how much I love Jane McGonigal's work in gamification to help make life easier, and more fun. McGonigal made a game, years ago, to help her heal from a serious injury.  It's called SuperBetter, and I'm setting up an account now.

I'm sort of misapplying the basic premise here, using it to treat bad habits rather than a specific illness or health goal, but I don't think it's out of the spirit of SuperBetter's function to use it to improve your ability to handle things in your life that stress you out.  I'm saying this because there's a page in the signup process where you have to select what you're using the site for:  Illness or injury; or, Health goal.

I picked illness or injury, and left it on Anxiety for a while.  But part way through the process of finishing the initial goals, I changed it to "Horrible money habits."

And since my goal isn't one of the clearly stated options, I'm going to choose to design my own adventure, rather than starting with a pre-made power pack.  Here, by the way, is a great bit of validation for my decision to use SuperBetter to deal with my money problems:

What are other people using SuperBetter for?
  • Finding a job
  • Getting pregnant
  • Writing a novel
  • Learning to dance
  • Detoxifying
  • Getting over a breakup
  • Overcoming a fear
  • Making more time for family

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Okay, I've finished setting up my profile and completing all the starting quests.   Now, I feel really, incredibly awful.  Like, (if you're familiar with the experience,) the way you feel when you're in therapy and you finally talk about something that's a really huge deal but you've been avoiding thinking about it for years.

Which, I guess, is pretty much what I'm doing here.  I've been semi-subconsciously deflecting my awareness of my money issues for years, and now it's really painful to address because it's big and scary and every little thing feels like a huge imposition and a massive personal flaw.  I just want to hide under a rock right now.

So, I think that's what I'm going to do.  I'm going to take a nap, and hopefully I'll feel a little better later.